I could delay this blog post for about 6 more months if I truly wanted too. Sometimes wanting everything to be perfect truly hurts me. I know blogging isn’t perfect and I need to let it go. I also need to go back and read a post I wrote a while ago all about letting go of control.
Honestly y’all, I am so glad to be back on the blog. There are a lot of changes coming to this blog. I have de-monetized my site, which means that I am no longer making any revenue from this blog and I’m happy about it. It is definitely hard when putting links on my site, but I don’t want this blog to be a business. I write because I enjoy it and it makes me happy. This is truly a hobby for me, and I want to let go of all of the pressure I put on myself.
I’ve always been this way though. I am such an all or nothing person. When I want to do something I love it and I’m all in, but I crash and burn quickly. Sometimes I burn out so fast, it doesn’t even make sense. But now that I know this about myself, I need to give myself more grace and do what I can when I can.
I wanted to come back on the blog and hit the ground running with a new post asap! But I’m making myself wait a few weeks before publishing anything because I do not want to burn out. I also have so many ideas, but I’d rather have 1 quality post published once a week then try to do 3 posts when I know that I already have so much on my plate as it is. So new posts on Fridays with Friday Five on the last Friday of the month, where I’ll share 5 tips or 5 things/ideas. If I miss a Friday, I’m no longer beating myself up about it because this is just a blog, not brain surgery.
three reasons why i can’t quit
1 | there aren’t many bloggers that blog about what I do & look like me
Don’t get me wrong – there are black, intentional living or minimalist bloggers out there. I was interviewed a while back on the Black Minimalists website that you can check out here. But as a whole, we are few and far between. There are a heap of minimalist and intentional living bloggers out there, but the vast majority are not people of color. And with the whole minimalist movement and Marie Kondo show on Netflix (btw, she is not a minimalist and constantly notes this, but no one listens) people have been decluttering and simplifying their life.
I feel like most of it is a phase, but we’ll see! Still, as I “stopped” blogging. I couldn’t find any bloggers that looked like me that had my same voice. When I received messages from y’all that you missed my blog posts, I knew there was still a need. I know there are some great black minimalist bloggers out there, but my voice and way of writing is unique and I want to continue to share it.
2 | i was born to write and creativity fuels me
Writing is in my blood. As much as I try to quit writing or blogging, it just makes me feel miserable. I’m so much happier when I am expressing myself creatively and doing what I want to do because I want to do it.
I want to share about things that are personal to me and freak me out. Like being open and honest about my financial journey and other projects I have in the works. Not everything can be perfect, so I’m just going to have to dive into the pool with all my clothes on and stop waiting for the perfect moment to take a leap.
3 | i need to do everything that scares me & let go of expectations
Most people are afraid of failure, but not me. To be incredibly vulnerable and honest, getting everything I’ve ever wanted freaks me out. Success scares me and I thought this was only me until I was watching a YouTube video by Stacey Flowers, who is on an amazing journey to pay off all of her debt while working for herself part-time. I truly admire her journey and I’m enjoying following along. I feel like success means you’ve achieved everything you’ve ever wanted. While that does seem amazing, I always feel like there should be more. But I’m working on being thankful for everything I have and not always wanting the next best thing.
I feel like part of me holding back while I’m blogging is because I was never the kid that wanted to be famous. I’m not saying that by me blogging I will become famous, but there is also potential there. Because you never know what could happen. From now on, let’s just see where this goes…
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